Part of what makes some moments so special is that you can't capture them on film, but it sure is great when you can have your cake and eat it too! I love this photo that Himay took of Lucas and I after a feeding. Ahh... <3
There are so many sweet little moments that I would love to capture and keep for my life. I can't believe how fast the last 8 weeks have gone. Of course, in some ways it feels longer and others, like it was yesterday.
Things are finally finding a rhythm in our household, which is allowing all of us to enjoy our time more. Lucas is just so damn precious! Its funny how in some moments when he is being very out SPOOOOOKEN I can be thinking about how much I just want a break and to do something "normal" that I used to. But when it comes down to it, I can't be away from this little guy!
Today I had a 2 hour time commitment to talk about massage with a group of doulas at Treasure Valley Midwives. I made sure that we had enough pumped milk and "coached" Himay on how to do it, (although he already knew). I had to be there at 11 so I woke up early enough to take care of myself and feed him. But he was sleepy and didn't want to eat when I had the time to feed him so I decided to pump. Himay and I were talking and then I started talking about how I was having a hard time even though it was only a couple hours. I totally started crying! I was sad that he was going to wake up without me there and vise versa. For eight weeks, I have been there to say good morning when he finally arises and been available to breast feed him.
I couldn't help but feel silly for crying but it was great to feel just how deeply I have bonded with him. He is so beautiful and I love him so much! Returning to work is going to be an interesting endeavor! I'm just so grateful that I work for myself and can be available often. Monday marks the real return to work, as I will be gone for a whopping 4 & 1/2 hours! Eeek!
Oh, the little one is calling for me...
Ah, such love!
<3 HJae
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