Mommy Meltdowns R Us

Fortunately, the title is an exaggeration. I'd prefer to say that I'm just an emotionally open, vulnerable, and expressive person. Much like my son I am discovering.

I have thoroughly been enjoying falling in love with my little Lucas but I can't deny the moments of my own utter confusion and frustration in trying to decipher my mommy style along side his newborn speak err cryyyyyy.

Before he was born I knew, all babies cry, its their way of communicating. No problem I thought. I'm an expert at nonverbal communication, truly thats what a bodyworker does. They read between the lines, understand subtle cues, and use their hands and "feeling tones" to express a message. I thought I can definitely understand my own child if I do this sort of thing for a living! Unfortunately, I was wrong. My bodyworker experience has helps me be a comforting mother, but it has not helped me decode the expressions of our loveable Lucas-aurus.

I've been holding up rather well without a doubt. It wasn't until last night that I finally lost it. I just couldn't figure out what he needed and I knew that what I could do- slap him on one of my breasts, was just ban-aiding what he truly needed, and potentially adding to the tears. I was home alone, thankfully, and allowing myself to shed as many tears as my son.

After the storm settled, in an attempt to understand what to do, I re-opened a book a friend gave us- "The Baby Whisperer." The last time I dug through those pages I deemed that it was over saturated with information and I didn't need it. And again, after many hours of contemplation and much confusion, I am concluding that yes, it is not the answer for me.

Which leads me to my point.
Mommies melt down not because of what they are or aren't doing. Its because of everyone else's opinions about what they should or shouldn't be doing running through their head. Enough already! As if having your life completely transform in a matter of minutes, days, or weeks isn't enough. Stop the information overload!

Yet...

I am a new mother, I need the information. I need to explore other people's insights and wisdom to discover my own amidst the similarities and differences. So here is my conclusion; it is not a major revelation but it is cathartic for me to type it out, so thank you.

The answer to information overloads any other aspect that shapes a "Mommy Style" is weaving a new web. Its a blessing to have all the information out there. But its even better to have the wisdom and honesty within to recognize what threads from the larger picture can be rewoven in your own humble reality.

So here's what I'm going to try, in part. After some internet research I've found an option that I am excited to explore, albeit a Oprah bandwagon.




I definitely paid more than I'd like to, but if it can save me the madness that I experienced last night and this morning, its worth every penny. 

I also discovered that a video a few facebook friends recommended: The Happiest Baby on the Block, is on Netflix. Score! So, I'll be watching that in a few days as well, for the much more affordable price of my netflix subscription.

I should also mention that "The Baby Whisperer" is also on Netflix. I don't know what it is about it, possibly the "catchy" title, but I can't quite quit on that Tracy Hogg yet.

Over and out,
Heidi Jae<3